Salesian Literature

Chapter 25:  Propriety in dress

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St. Paul wishes that devout women – the same must be said of men – ought to be dressed in proper clothes adorning themselves with modesty and sobriety (1 Tim. 2:9-10).  Now, the propriety of the dress and other ornaments depend upon the material, style and cleanliness.  As to cleanliness, it should almost always be uniform in our clothes.  As far as possible, we must not leave any stain or dirt on them.  Exterior cleanliness reflects to some extent interior uprightness.  God demands even bodily cleanliness in those who approach his altars and have the principal charge of devotion (Is. 52:11).

 

As to the material and style of the clothes propriety depends on several circumstances such as time, age, rank, company and occasions.  Usually we dress better on feast days, in proportion to the importance of the day celebrated.  In seasons of penance like Lent we put away fine clothes.  At marriage people put on wedding garments, at funerals mourning.  In the company of princes, we put on richer garments which we put off when we are at home.

 

A married woman may and ought to dress herself when with her husband as he want it.  However, if she does the same when she is away from him, she will be asked as to whose eyes she is seeking to please with such particular care.  Girls are allowed more finery as they can lawfully desire to please many so as to gain only one by holy marriage.  People do not take it ill for widows intending to marry to dress themselves well provided they do not appear frivolous.  As they have already been mothers of families, who passed through the grief of widowhood, people consider them more mature and well-ordered.

 

But as to true widows who are such not only in body but also in heart no ornaments are suitable to them except that of humility, modesty and devotion.  For if they wish to give love to men, then they are not true widows.  If they do not want to give love why do they carry the instruments of love?  He who does not wish to receive lodgers ought to remove the signboard from the lodge.  People always laugh at old persons when they try to appear pretty.  Such foolishness is tolerable only in the youth.

 

Be neat, Philothea.  Let there be nothing untidy or disorderly about you.  It is a contempt of those with whom we live to go among them in displeasing attire.  But take heed well against affections, vanities, curiosities and frivolities.  As much as possible keep always on the side of simplicity and modesty, without doubt the greatest ornament of beauty, and the best excuse fro being unattractive.  St. Peter warns, especially young women, not to wear their hair too crisped, frizzy, ringed and plaited (1 Pet. 3:3).

 

Men who foolishly amuse themselves with such trifles are discredited everywhere as effeminate, and vain women are thought to be weak in chastity.  At least if they are thought to be chaste it is not visible in the midst of such rubbish and nonsense.  People say that they do not mean evil in such things but I reply, as I explain elsewhere[1], that the devil always does so.

 

As for me, I would like that devout persons, whether men or women, be always the best dressed of the group but the least pompous and affected and, as the Proverb says, adorned with grace, propriety and dignity (Prov. 31:25).  St. Louis says in one word: “We must dress according to our state in such a way that the wise and good may not say: you do too much, nor the young may say: you do too little.”  But in case the young are not satisfied with propriety, they ought to abide by the advice of the wise.

 

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[1]  Part III, Chapter 27.

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