Salesian Literature

Vol. 1, CONFERENCE 10 : Obedience: First Conference

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Given by Our Blessed Father to his dear Daughters of the Visitation.

 

Obedience is a moral virtue which depends on JUSTICE.  Now, there are certain virtues which are so related to the theological virtues of FAITH, HOPE and CHARITY, that they seem to be almost theological.  Such are the virtues of PENANCE and RELIGION, and so also JUSTICE and OBEDIENCE.

 

Obedience has two aspects:  one is to obey superiors and the other to obey equals and inferiors.  The latter belongs to humility, meekness and charity rather than to obedience.  For the one who is humble, esteems that others excel him, are better than him, and as such holds them as superior to himself.

 

As for the first, with regard to those whom God has placed over us, in order to guide us, it forms an integral part of JUSTICE and OBEDIENCE and has to be practised in total submission of our intellect and will.  Now, this obedience of the intellect is practised, when, on receiving obedience, we accept and approve the command, not only with our will but also with our mind.  Thus we consent to and esteem what is commanded and judge it to be better than any other thing that could have been ordered under the same circumstances.  It is then that we love obedience so much that we want constantly to be commanded, so that whatever we do is done through obedience.  This is the obedience of the perfect and this I desire for each of you.  Such obedience is a pure gift of God, or it is acquired after much time and effort, with many acts performed repeatedly and courageously.  Thus we gain the habit of obedience.  Our natural disposition always wants to command and has a great dislike to obey.  However, we have in fact a great capacity to obey and none at all to command.

 

Common Obedience has three conditions:

 

The first is to consent to what is ordered and gently yield our will to it; being happy to be commanded; for we cannot become truly obedient if there is no one to command us just as the means to become gentle is not to live all alone in a desert.

 

The second condition lies in the promptness with which we obey.  Opposed to this is laziness or spiritual sadness.  Rarely a sad person does things readily and earnestly.  In theological language, laziness is called spiritual sadness and it prevents us from obeying swiftly and courageously.  We cannot cross rivers more surely than by boat; so too, we cannot make the passage of life more safely than by means of obedience.

 

The third condition is perseverance.  It is not enough that we consent to obey a command for some time only.  We need to persevere in it, and it is perseverance which merits for us the crown (Mt. 10:22; 24:13).

 

We find some inspiring examples of this perseverance everywhere and particularly in the life of St. Pachomius.  Some monks have persevered with unbelievable patience in performing the same exercise, day in and day out, all their life.  The good Father Jonas did nothing else throughout his life except weave amts.  He was so used to do it that he could do it even with windows shut as he prayed and meditated.  One did not exclude the other.  Finally, he was found dead with his legs crossed and the mat spread over them.  He had to be buried just as he was found.  He died doing something he had been doing all his life.

 

It is indeed, an act of great humility to perform a mean task by obedience all through one’s life.  But it may happen that day after day we are tempted to think that we are able to do something great.  This third condition is the most difficult of all because of the weakness and inconstancy of the human spirit.  It happens that right now we like to do one thing, but soon after we do not even want to look at it.  If we were to follow all the desires of our spirit, or if we were to do so without causing any scandal or disgrace, we would see only mere changes.  After being a Jesuit for one hour, we would want to become a Capuchin the next, and then, not long after we would look for another kind of life.  A man who has lived all his life in peace with his wife if he had the possibility of changing her, he would have done it a dozen times.  Let us go still further: if we could, we would change our father and mother.  Such is the extreme inconsistency of the human spirit.  But we must put a stop to it with the strength of our first decisions.

 

Now, in order to love obedience in times of temptations, we have to reflect on its goodness, its beauty, its worth, its usefulness to encourage us to go on our way.  This is true of persons who are not yet well-grounded in obedience; for, when it is a question of a simple aversion or dislike of the thing commanded, all that is required is only to make an act of love and to go ahead.  When I say, “by the act of love”, I do not mean an act of love that is felt for this is not in our power and it is not really necessary.  I mean by it an act of love which is reasonable, originating in the fine point of the spirit.  It is thus that the true handmaids of the Lord should conduct themselves.  Otherwise, we will not make any progress at all.  if we are attached to these tender feelings and spiritual delights and if we are not resolved to serve God with the fine point of our resolutions, we shall have neither true virtues nor a love that is solid.

 

I knew a gentleman who once told me, on seeing another passing by: “You see there a man I love with a strong love.  I have never spoken to him and I shall never speak to him.  I avoid every occasion of speaking to him.”  I asked him, “Why so, since you love him so much?”  He replied: “You see, if I greet him, he may not speak to me as well as I imagined or he may do something unpleasant and I may not be able to love him any more!”  See, how our affections, when they are tied to so many insignificant things, get out of order.

 

We should not, then, pay attention to dislike and difficulties so long as the fine point of our spirit is fixed on its sovereign good.  Our Lord himself suffered from them in his Passion, for he had a great dislike for death.  He himself spoke about it.  But he was totally resigned, with the fine point of his spirit to the will of his Father.  Everything else in him revolted against it.

 

Perseverance in things that touch our inner self is more difficult.  In things which are merely material and external it is far easier.  This is because it is very difficult for us to surrender our judgement.  It is the last thing we ever want to give up, but it is, nevertheless, extremely necessary for us to submit out thoughts in certain matters.  We have to bend our reason to obey all commands in such a way that when we are asked to perform certain exercises or to practise certain virtues, we should do so for as long a time as we are asked to.  I do not call it lack of perseverance when we interrupt the exercise for a little while, provided we take it up again and do not give it up altogether.  We also do not go against obedience if we fail to observe some of its conditions.  We are bound only to the essence of the virtue and not to its conditions.  And even if we obey with some reluctance forced as it were by the duty of our state, our obedience is still a virtue, thanks to our initial decision.  However, our obedience has an infinite value and merit when it is accepted with all the conditions of which I have spoken; for a thing, however small it may be, has a very great value when it is done under obedience.

 

Obedience is such an excellent virtue that Our Lord himself chose to live his whole life in obedience to it.  He often said that he did not come to do his own will (Jn. 4:34; 5:30; 6:38).  The Apostle Paul said of him: he became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross (Phil. 2:8). Our Lord thus willed to join the infinite merit of his perfect charity to the infinite merit of perfect obedience.  Charity gives way to obedience, for obedience depends on justice; it is better to pay the debt one owes to another than to give alms; this means that it is better to make an act of obedience than to make an act of charity of our own choice.

 

The spirituality of this community has to be a spirituality that is fully generous and free from all tenderness, of feelings and consolation and sentimentality.  We must not desire at all to be freed from our difficulties, reluctances and dislikes since they do not harm us.  On the contrary when we are ordered to do something which our heart loathes entirely, all the same, we go to do it by the strength of our intellectual love.  There is no doubt that this action is infinitely more valuable than if we were to do it without dislike and consequently of less value.  We can always make up for what is lacking by doing the same action with immense love; for, in this present action we do not have to merit to excel ourselves, since we have no difficulty in doing it; we have, nevertheless, had difficulties in the past actions, which we have overcome.  We cannot reap the harvest twice.

 

Another kind of obedience is a certain flexibility of our will to follow the will of another.  It is an extremely loveable virtue which makes our mind readily adaptable to all circumstances and prepares us to do God’s will always.

 

Take an example: I am on my way to one place and I meet a Sister who tells me to go to another place.  God’s will for me is that I do what the Sister tells me to do; if, however, I do not agree with her and I still intend going on my own way, God’s will for her is that she give way to my point of view … and so on about other things which of themselves are of no special consequence. But, if it happens that in these two opinions, both wish to give in, you should not remain at this impasse, but see which opinion is more reasonable and preferable and follow it quite simply.  It should be done with great circumspection, for it would not be right to lay aside a thing that is important, to do a thing that is insignificant.  If I wished to do a great act of mortification and a Sister came and told me not to do it, or to do some other action, I would, if that were possible, give up my original idea to do her will and later achieve my first intention.  But if I really could not leave it out and what the Sister wanted me to do was not necessary then I would do what I had first undertaken.

 

When a Sister requests a service from us and unconsciously we show some reluctance that Sister is not to get offended nor show that she has noticed it; she is not to ask us not to do it.  It is not in our power to prevent our colour, our eyes or face from showing the struggle going on within us even when we want to do the thing with our reason.  These are messengers who came without being called.  Even when we tell them to go away, usually they do not do so.  Why this Sister does not want me to do what she asks?  Only because she has noticed the reluctance I feel to do it.  She must be happy that I do it for my own benefit.  You may say that she is afraid of seeing you angry.  It is your self love which does not tolerate that I had a little thought that you are troublesome.  I had the thought but I do not entertain it.  If, however, to these signs of reluctance I also add words which say openly that I do not feel like doing what she requests me to do, then she can and ought to tell me very gently not to do it as long as it is a matter between equals.  But when it is a question of those in authority, they should be firm and persuade the subjects.

 

Now, when a Sister clearly refuses something I have asked for or shows an open reluctance, I should not lose heart in seeking her help again.  I should also not be surprised to see this imperfection in her.  If I hear with her just now, she will also bear with me some other time.  Just now she feels reluctant to do the thing but at another time she will do it most willingly.  However, if through my knowledge of her, I am convinced that she is not the kind of person who would go out of her way to help me, I should, then, take my time and wait till she becomes a little more accommodating.

 

We must therefore, realise that we all are liable to fall into the defects of others.  We remain for some time without committing any fault at all.  Then comes a time when we fail and commit several bigger imperfections continuously.  We have to learn to profit from the humiliation we suffer because of it.  We have to suffer patiently the delay in making progress in perfection and do all we can to correct ourselves and do so gladly.

 

As for temptations where there is a danger of us falling into sin, we ought to ask God to deliver us from them, after the example of St. Paul (2 Cor. 12:7,9), who, finding that he was tormented by a thorn in the flesh asked the Lord three times to deliver him from it.  Even if the Lord had not answered him, he would still have persisted in his prayer.  But when Our Lord said to him: My grace is all you need; for my power comes to its full strength in weakness, he remained at peace amidst this struggle.  It is thus that Our Lord is glorified in our imperfections, when, in spite of their large number and diversity, we do not offend God.  Great, indeed, is his grace and power since he sustains us amidst so many and so great weaknesses, and gives us strength to make us perfect.  If we remain rooted in our imperfections, God will not be glorified in us.

 

To acquire this flexibility to follow the will of another it is enough to make often acts of surrender in prayer and then put them into practice when the occasion arises; for, it is pointless to strip ourselves before God in imagination; it means nothing at all.  To be effective we offer ourselves entirely to God, we find a person who orders us.  There is a great difference.  It is there that we must show our courage.

 

This gentleness in yielding to the will of our neighbour is a virtue of priceless value; it is the symbol of the prayer of union.  Since this prayer is none other than abandonment of ourselves entirely to God, when the heart says with sincerity: I have no other will apart from yours, Lord.  It is then that we are totally united to God; likewise when we renounce our will to do always the will of our neighbour, it is the true union with our neighbour, and we have to do all this for the love of God.

 

If often happens that a person, who is mentally and physically weak, can do only little things.  If he does them with great love, then these actions are of much greater value than great and lofty deeds.  For, ordinary lofty actions are performed with less love because of the care and other considerations surrounding them.  If, however, a great work is done with as much love as a small one, undoubtedly, the one who does it has greater merit and reward.

 

Finally, it is charity which gives value to all our actions, in such a way that all the good we do, we must do it out of love for God and the evil we avoid ought to be out of love for God.  the good actions we do and which are not specially commanded do not obtain their merit from obedience as such.  We must give them their full worth by doing them out of love for God.  Finally, we may do everything out of obedience, since God has commanded that we should practise all the virtues.  In short, we must be courageous and rely on God alone.  It is the characteristic of the Daughters of the Visitation to see God’s will in all things and to follow it.

 

You tell me that something during silence you feel like saying an Ave Maris Stella or a Veni Creator or some other prayer while at work.  There is no problem in doing so.  It is a good thing as a form of prayer.  It is a little good deed in which you acquire some merit like kissing a holy picture or something similar.  Now we must take care that it is not done at the expense of something better.  For instance, you are before the Blessed Sacrament.  You fell the devotion to say three Our Father in honour of the Holy Trinity.  Then someone comes to call you to go and do something else.  You must get up immediately, go and do this service in honour of the Holy Trinity instead of saying the three Our Father.  These things are useful for some, others do not need it.  There are all kinds of plants in the garden. If you find there a plant more useful than all the rest, it does not mean that we use only that one for cooking.

 

It is the same concerning the practice of virtues, ejaculatory prayers of genuflexions.  A Sister must not decide in advance to do a particular number of them daily or at a special time without telling the Superior even though she has to be very faithful in doing it.  If you think that it is the Holy Spirit who inspires you to do these devotional practices still he would be pleased if you ask permission.  If you are not allowed do not perform them at all.  Nothing is so pleasing to him as religious obedience.

 

Hence, you cannot promise anybody to say a certain number of Our Father for them.  If anyone requests you to do it, you are to answer that you will ask permission. If a person simply recommends herself to your prayers, you may say that you will do it willingly and at the same time raise your heart to God for that person.

 

It is the same as regards Holy Communion.  For you cannot offer your communion for another person without permission.  It does not mean that when you are ready to receive Our Lord and the common needs of the people come to your mind, you cannot offer them to God praying for his mercy.  Such a prayer is far from being wrong; the more general your prayer, the more pleasing it is to God.  if you wish to receive communion for a special intention, you must ask permission unless it is for your own personal needs such as strength against some temptation or to pray for some virtue form Our Lord.

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