Salesian Literature

Conference 10  :  On Obedience

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obedience is one of the moral virtues, depending upon justice. Now, there are certain moral virtues, such as penitence, religion, justice, and obedience, which have so great an affinity with the theological virtues, faith, hope, and charity, that they seem almost theological, although they hold a very inferior rank. Taking obedience, it consists in two points. The first is to obey our superiors; the second, to obey our equals and inferiors. The latter, however, belongs rather to humility, gentleness, and charity than to obedience; for the humble think that all others surpass them, and are far better than they, so that they make them their superiors and believe that they ought to obey them.

 

As regards, however, the obedience due to those Superiors whom God has set over us to rule us, it is just and necessary, and ought to be rendered with an entire submission of our understanding and will. We practise this obedience of the understanding when, being commanded to do anything, we accept and approve the command, not only with the will but also with our understanding, approving and esteeming the thing commanded, and judging it better than any other thing which we could have been commanded on that occasion. When we have reached this point, we so love to obey that we have an insatiable desire to be commanded so that all that we do may be done from obedience; and this is the obedience of the perfect, which I desire for you.  It is a pure gift from God, or else it is acquired with much time and labour, by means of a series of acts, often repeated and earnestly effected, by means of which we form the habit.  Our natural inclination always leads us to wish to command, and makes us dislike to obey, and yet it is certain that we have a great, capacity for obeying, and perhaps none at all for commanding.

 

Ordinary obedience has three conditions. The first is to accept the thing which we are commanded to do, and to bend our will gently to it, loving to be commanded; for to have no one to command us is not the way to make us become truly obedient, any more than living alone in a desert is the way to become meek. Cassian relates that when he was in the desert he sometimes became angry, and that when he took up a pen to write, and found it would not mark, he threw it away. Thus, he says, living alone is of no avail, since we carry our anger about with us. Virtue is something positive, not a mere absence of its contrary. The second condition of obedience is promptitude, to which is opposed spiritual sloth or sadness; for it seldom happens that a soul in sadness does a thing promptly and diligently. In theological language sloth is called spiritual sadness, and as such prevents us from yielding brave and prompt obedience[1]. The third condition is perseverance; for it is not enough to accept the command and execute it for a certain space of time, if we do not persevere in so doing, for it is this perseverance which wins the crown [Mt. 10:22; 24:13].

 

Admirable examples of perseverance are to be found everywhere, but especially in the life of St. Pachomius. There have been monks who throughout their whole lives have, with incredible patience, persevered in doing only one kind of work; like the good Father Jonas, who, besides gardening, never did anything in his life but make mats, and who was so much accustomed to this occupation that he continued it with the light shut out (no glass in their windows or holes) while he prayed and meditated, the one occupation not interfering with the other; and at last they found him dead, his legs crossed and his mat stretched above them. He died doing what he had been doing all his life. It is an act of great humility to go on all our lives doing from obedience one same and mean work, tempted possibly to think that we are quite capable of greater things.

 

Now, this third condition is the most difficult of all, on account of the levity and inconstancy of the human spirit, for at one moment we love to do a thing, and the next we will not even look at it. If we would follow all the motions of our spirit, and if it were possible to do so without disedification or loss of due self-respect, we should see nothing but change[2]: one moment we should wish to be in one condition, and the next we should seek another, so extravagant is this inconstancy of the human mind. But we must bring the strength of our first resolutions to bear upon this inconstancy, so as to arrest it, and so live an equable life amid the diversities of our own feelings and of what happens around us.

 

Now, when we are tempted to disobedience, we must, in order to increase our love for obedience, represent to ourselves its excellence, beauty, and merit, as well as its utility, so as to encourage ourselves to hold firm. This applies, however, to souls not yet well grounded in obedience; but when it is only a question of simple disinclination and dislike of the thing we are commanded to do, we must just make an act of love and then set to work[3]. Even Our Lord in His Passion shrank with an unspeakable horror and loathing from the pains of death; He says so Himself [Mt. 24:38-39; Mk. 14:34, 36], but in the superior part of His soul He was resigned to the will of His Father; all the rest was only the struggle of nature.

 

The most difficult kind of perseverance is that which is required for interior matters, for in those which are material and exterior it is tolerably easy. The reason of this is that it costs us so much to submit our understanding, which is the very last thing we give up; and yet it is absolutely necessary that we should bring our thoughts into control with regard to certain objects, so that when certain exercises or virtuous practices are marked out for us, we may persevere in them and make our mind accept them. I do not call it a failure in perseverance when we occasionally allow little interruptions in our obedience, provided that we do not abandon it altogether; just as it is not failing in obedience when we neglect to observe some of its conditions, the substance of virtues and not their accidents being incumbent upon us. For even though we may obey with repugnance, and almost as if forced by the obligation of our state, our obedience remains intact by virtue of our first re­solution; but its value and merit are unboundedly great when it is yielded with the conditions which I have mentioned, however small the thing, when done with such obedience as this it is of very great worth.

 

Obedience is so excellent a virtue that Our Lord condescended to direct the whole course of His life on earth by it. He tells us often that He came not to do His own will, but the will of His Father [Jn. 4:34; 5:30; 6:38]; and the Apostle says that He made Himself obedient unto death, even the death of the cross [Phil. 2:8]. He was pleased to add to the infinite merit of His perfect charity the infinite merit of a perfect obedience. Obedience takes precedence of charity, because obedience comes under justice, as again it is better to pay our debts than to give alms; hence it is better to obey than to perform an act of charity of our own choice.[4]

 

The second point of obedience is rather humility than obedience; for it is a certain flexibility of our will in following that of others, and it is a most attractive virtue, which makes us prompt to turn our own will in any direction, and disposes us to do at all times the will of God. For example, if when I am going in one direction I meet a sister who tells me to go in another, the will of God for me is that I should do what she wishes rather than what I wish; but if I oppose my opinion to hers, the will of God for her is that she should give way to me, and thus it is in all indifferent matters. If, however, it should happen that in this initial differ­ence of opinion both would wish to give way, there must be no lingering over the discussion; it must quickly be decided which is the better and more reasonable thing to choose, and do it simply. Dis­cretion must come in, for it would not be right to give up something of necessity in favour of some matter of indifference. If I was going to perform some act of great mortification, and a sister came to desire me not to do it, or to do some other, I would if possible put off to another time my first plan, so as to do her will, and then later on I would carry out my own. If, however, I could neither omit nor defer it, and if what she desired of me were not necessary, I would do what I had first designed, and then, if I could, I would find the means of carrying out the sister's wishes.

 

Supposing, however, that a sister should ask us to do something, and that we, being taken by surprise, should show some repugnance to doing it, the sister must not take umbrage, nor even seem to notice it; neither must she beg us not to do what she had asked, for it is not in our power to prevent our colour, our eyes, our behaviour, from betraying the struggle going on within us, even while our reason consents to do the thing; for these are messengers who come unsummoned, and who, even when we bid them depart, seldom do anything of the sort. Why, then, should this sister be unwilling to let me do what she had asked, simply because I show some repugnance to doing it? She ought to be glad that I should gain this profit for my soul. You may say: "Because she fears to have vexed you." No; it is self-love, unwilling that I should entertain the smallest thought that she is troublesome. Indeed, it is just that thought that I have, though I do not consent to it. If, however, to the signs of my repugnance, I add words showing plainly that I have no wish to do what this sister asks, she may and should tell me gently not to do it, supposing that we are on an equality. Those, however, who are in authority must remain firm and make their inferiors yield. But even if a sister may have absolutely refused to do a thing for me, or however much repugnance she may have shown, I must not hesitate to ask her services on another occasion, nor must I even be disedified by her imperfection; for at present I have to bear with her, and very soon she will have to boar with me—just now she dislikes doing the thing, and another time she will do it willingly. If, however, I knew by experience that hers was a disposition as yet incapable of acting in this manner, I would wait a while until she was more enlightened.

 

We must all of us make allowance for one another's faults, and must not be at all put out when we come across them. If for a time we ourselves go on quietly without falling into any, another time will come when we shall find ourselves failing continually, and committing considerable imperfections; by which, however, we must profit, on account of the humiliation which they will bring upon us. We must suffer with patience the delay in our perfection, while ever cheerfully doing what we can for our advancement therein.

 

Oh, how happy are those who, if made to wait all their lives, never grow weary of waiting![5] I say this for the sake of many who, having the desire to attain perfection by acquiring virtues, would like to. have them at once, as if perfection consisted in desiring it. It would indeed be a fine thing if we could become humble as soon as we desired it, and without any more trouble. We must accustom ourselves to seek the attainment of our perfection by the usual paths, in tranquillity of heart, doing all in our power to acquire virtues, by our fidelity in practising each of them according to our condition and vocation; but we must be content to wait as regards sooner or later attaining the result of our aims, leaving that to divine Providence, which will not fail to console us at the appointed time, and even if that should not be till the hour of our death, we ought to be satisfied, so long as we fulfil our duty by ever doing all that depends on us, all that is in our power. We shall always have quite soon enough what we desire, whenever we have it, and whenever it pleases God to give it to us. This waiting and resignation are very necessary, for the want of them disturbs the soul greatly. We must, be contented to know that we are doing our duty through those who are over us, not seeking for any satisfaction or knowledge of things in particular, but walking blindfold, as it were, in firm reliance on the Providence of God, in the midst of all the desolation, fears, gloom, and other crosses which it may please Him to send us. Give yourself up, then, my dear daughter, wholly, wholly to His guidance, without any reserve or exception whatever, and leave Him to act, confiding all the care of body and soul to His goodness, remaining always resigned, com­posed, and resting upon God, under the guidance of Superiors, without any care but to obey.

 

Now, the means of acquiring this ready yielding to the will of others, is to make very often in our prayer acts of indifference, and then to put them in practice when the occasion presents itself. For it is not enough to renounce ourselves before God; that is no great matter, seeing that it is only done in imagination; but when it has to be done actually, and when having just given ourselves wholly to God, we come in contact with a fellow-creature who orders us about, that is quite a different thing, and it is then that we must show our courage.

 

This gentleness and yielding to the will of our neighbour is a virtue of great price; it is the symbol of the prayer of union. For as that form of prayer is nothing but the renouncing of ourselves in God, so, when the soul says with truth: "I have no longer any will but Thine, Lord!" she becomes entirely united to God. In like manner, the renunciation of our own will to do our neighbour's is true union with that neighbour; in all things acting for the love of God.

 

It often happens that a person, mean and feeble both in body and mind, and who only attempts small things, will do them with so much charity that they far surpass the merit of great and exalted actions, which, generally speaking, are done with less charity, on account of the thought and attention which have to be given to their various circumstances, If, however, a great work is done with as much charity as the small one, doubtless the doer of it will obtain much greater merit and reward.  In a word, it is charity which gives price and value to all our works, so that all the good which we do must be done for the love of God, and the evil which we avoid must be avoided for the love of God.  The good actions which we do, but not by any special command, and which cannot therefore derive any merit from obedience, must acquire that merit through charity, although we can really do them all from obedience.[6]  In short, we must be generous and depend only upon God; for the characteristic of the daughters of the Visitation is to regard in all things the will of God, and to follow it. You asked me before whether you might say special private prayers.  I reply that as regards those little prayers which you sometimes have a devotion to say, there can be no harm in doing so, provided that you do not make too great a point of saying them, so that any omission of them excites scruples in your mind; or provided, again, that you do not make a resolution to say some particular prayer which you fancy, every day, or for a whole year or other fixed time, for that must not be done. If, however, during the time of silence, we should from devotion wish to say an Ave Maris Stella, or a Veni Creator Spiritus, or the like, there is no reason why we should not say it, nor any doubt about its being a good thing to do; but we must take great care that it is done without prejudice to something more important. For instance, being in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament, if you felt a devotion to say three Paters in honour of the Blessed Trinity, and you were suddenly called away to do something else, you must rise instantly and go to do this action in honour of the Blessed Trinity, instead of saying your three Paters.[7]

 

You must not, then, prescribe for yourself the making a certain number of genuflections, ejaculatory prayers, or similar practices every day, or during any particular time, without telling the Superior, although you must be very faithful in your practice of raising your heart to God, and of making ejaculations.  And even if you think it is the Holy Ghost Who inspires you to practise these little devotions, He will be pleased that you ask leave to practise them, and even that you omit them if permission is denied you, because nothing is so pleasing to Him as religious obedience.  Neither can you promise persons to say a certain number of prayers for them.  If you are asked to do it, you must reply that you will ask permission; but if they simply recommend themselves to your prayers, you may answer that you will certainly pray fro them, and at the very time raise your mind to God in favour of the person.  It is the same with regard to Holy Communion, for you cannot receive communion for anyone without permission.  This does not mean that, being about to receive Our Lord, if you should suddenly remember the necessities of some relative, or the common wants of the people, you may not recommend them to God, entreating Him to have compassion on them.  But if you wish to communicate specially for some particular thing, you must ask leave, unless it be for your own necessities, such as to obtain strength against some temptations, or to ask some virtue of Our Lord.  Blessed be His name!

 

 

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[1] We cannot pass over rivers more safely than in a ship or boat; so, too, we cannot make the voyage of life more securely than by means of obedience.  (Addition.)

[2] When we had been Jesuits for an hour, we should wish to be Capuchins the next, and a little later on we should want to enter some other state. There are men who have lived in perfect peace with their wife to the end of their days, and yet, if they could, would have changed her for another a dozen times. If we could, we would change our very father and mother. (Addition.)

[3] I do not mean an act of sensible love, for such is not in our power, nor is it at all necessary; I mean an act of reasonable love, springing from the higher part of our soul, for this is the duty of true servants of God, and in no other way shall we make any progress. If we cling to these little softnesses and spiritual sweetnesses, and do not make our resolutions of God 'a service in our higher will, we shall never attain to true virtue or solid love. A gentleman of my acquaintance, seeing another passing by one day, said to me: "There is a man whom I love with a great ardour, but I have never spoken to him, nor will I ever speak to him, for I avoid as far as I can every opportunity of doing so." "But why," I said, "since you love him so much?"  "Because," he answered, "If I were to accost him, perhaps he would not speak so nicely as I have imagined he would do; or he might do something awkward or ungracious, and then I could no longer love him. " You see that when our affections depend on so many little things they are subject to a thousand disorders. We must pay no heed at all to dislikes or difficulties, provided that in the higher region of the soul we cling always to out sovereign object. (Addition.)

[4] The spiritual life of this house ought to be of the noblest kind, quite independent of all sorts of softness, relish, and sensible consolations. We must not desire to be rid of our diffi­culties, of our natural dislikes and antipathies, for they do us no harm whatever. On the contrary, when we are commanded to do something at which our whole nature rebels, and yet we do it by the strength of an intelligent love, there is no doubt that such an action is of infinitely greater merit than if we had done it without repugnance. (Addition.)

[5] As to temptations, where there is danger of sin we may ask God to deliver us from them, after the example of St. Paul, who, being troubled by the sting of the flesh, thrice besought God to deliver him therefrom, and would have continued his prayer had Our Lord not answered him. As soon, however, as Our Lord said: My grace is sufficient for thee, for power is made perfect in infirmity, he remained in peace amid this war. In this manner is God glorified in our temptations when, notwithstanding their number and variety, we offend Him not; for Ills grace and power must be very great to keep us up amidst infirmities so many and so immense, and to give us the strength to become perfect. So long as we remain in our imperfections, God will not be glorified by them.

[6] Because God has commanded all the virtues.   (Addition.)

[7] These things are sometimes useful to certain characters; others have no need of them. There are all sorts of herbs in a garden, and although there may be one there more excellent than all the others, it does not mean that we are to put no other into the pot. (Addition.)

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