Salesian Literature

Salesian Views on

::   Faith  ::   Fasting  ::   Fidelity  ::   Friendship

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Friendship

 

Friendship that which is evil and frivolous:

Introduction to the Devout Life, 3:17. Love holds the first rank among the emotions of the soul.  It is the king of all the movements of the heart.  Love changes all the rest to itself and makes us such as what is loved.  Be on your guard then, dear Philothea, that there is no evil whatever in your love because if there is, soon you will become completely evil.

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Flirtations or Fickle Love:

Introduction to the Devout Life, 3:18  When these foolish friendships are between persons of different sex and without any intention of marriage they are called flirtations.  In fact, there are only some miserable specimens or phantoms of friendship. 

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Genuine Friendships:

Introduction to the Devout Life, 3:19 Philothea, love everyone with a great love of charity but have friendship with those capable of communicating virtuous things to you.  The more exquisite the virtue you put in your exchange the more perfect will your friendship be.

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The difference between true and vain friendships:

Introduction to the Devout Life, 3:20. This then, is the great warning, dear Philothea.  The honey of Heraclea which is so poisonous resembles the genuine which is so wholesome.

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Counsels and Remedies against evil friendships:

Introduction to the Devout Life, 3:21. What are the remedies against this brood and swarm of foolish lovers, indecencies and impurities?  As soon as you sense the first feelings turn away from them at once.  With an absolute detestation of this vanity run to the Cross of the Saviour.

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Some Further counsels on friendship:

Introduction to the Devout Life, 3:22. Friendship requires a great communication between friends. Otherwise, it can neither begin nor exist.

 

Spiritual Friendship:

Letter to Madame de Chantal. What difference does it make if you know whether or not you can consider me your spiritual father, as long as you know how my soul is disposed toward yours, and I know how yours is toward mine? 

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Letter to Madame de Chantal. All the little complications and hidden contradictions that come up unexpectedly to disturb my peace actually fill me with an even more serene peace and, it seems to me, are a sign that my soul will soon be settled in God. 

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Letter to Madame de Villesavin. Don’t ever believe, my dearest daughter, that great distances can separate those whom God has united by the bonds of His love.  The children of this world are all separated one from another because their hearts are in different places; but the children of God whose hearts are where their treasure is (cf. Lk. 12:34) and who all have the same treasure – which is the same God – are consequently always bound and united together. 

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