Salesian Literature

Preface

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- Henri J.M. Nouwen

 

When I started reading the letters of Francis de Sales and Jane de Chantal published in this book, I expected to be faced with an old fashioned piety that might be of some historical interest but would not be able to touch the hearts of men and women of the nuclear age.  But when I finished, I knew that I had met a man and a woman of such spiritual depth and breadth that the period between 1567, the year of Francis’ birth, and 1641, the year of Jane’s death, was but a sowing season of their spiritual influence.  In fact I am gradually becoming aware that our contemporary predicament allows us to find in these letters what is crucial for our own spiritual survival: a Jesus-centred, affectionate friendship.

 

This Jesus-centred, affectionate friendship pervades all the letters that Francis and Jane wrote to their correspondents, but the source is clearly the friendship between themselves.  Regretfully, most of the letters of Jane to Francis have been destroyed and, therefore, we can only indirectly discern the mutuality of their friendship.  Still, there is no doubt that all the letters published in this book – the letters from Francis to Jane as well as the many letters from Francis and Jane to others – are undergirded by the “bond of perfection” that bound them together in a mutual Jesus-centred love.

 

What is most obvious from this correspondence is that Jesus stands in the centre of the lives of both Francis and Jane. The love of God revealed in Jesus Christ pervades every line of the letters they both wrote.  They are two people whose friendship is solidly anchored in their common love of God.  It is a mediated friendship.  There lies the secret of their freedom and their fruitfulness.  Francis and Jane are not two lonely people who cling to each other in order to find a safe home in the midst of a fearful world.  Both of them have found Jesus as the bridegroom of their souls.  He is the fulfilment of all their desires.  He himself makes their friendship possible.  They have been given to each other as spiritual friends, to enjoy each other’s spiritual gifts, to support each other in their commitment to faithfulness, to be of mutual help in their search for perfection and to give shape to a new spiritual family in the Church.  In an era in which so much emphasis is put on the interpersonal and so much attention is given to emotions, passions and feelings as the “stuff” that makes or breaks relationships, the Jesus-centred friendship between Francis de Sales and Jane de Chantal is a challenge to us.  Without Jesus, friends tend to become possessive of each other and are easily tempted to violence when mutual expectations are not fulfilled.  Without Jesus there remains ample freedom for the unique ways of the individual persons.  Without Jesus, friends tend to close in on each other and ignore the larger world.  With Jesus friendships can bear fruit which many can enjoy.  Francis and Jane show us clearly that the deepest intimacy among people is an intimacy that finds its origin and goal not in human partners, but in God who gives people to each other in friendship to be incarnate manifestations of the divine love.  Most noticeable in the friendship which Francis and Jane show for each other and the people entrusted to their care is the affectionate quality.

 

There is a remarkable directness with which affection is expressed in these letters.  On June 24, 1604, Francis wrote to Jane:

 

I know you have complete confidence in my affection; I have no doubt about this and delight in the thought.  I want you to know and to believe that I have an intense and very special desire to serve you with all my strength. It would be impossible for me to explain either the quality or the greatness of this desire that I have to be at your service, but I can tell you that I believe it is from God, and for that reason, I cherish it and every day see it growing and increasing remarkably.  If it were appropriate, I would say more, and say it in all truth, but I had better stop here.  Dear Madam, you can see clearly enough to what extent you may call on me and trust me.  Make the most of my affection and of all that God has given me for the service of your soul.  I am all yours; give no more though to the role or to the rank I hold in being yours.  God has given me to you; so consider me as yours in Him, and call me whatever you like; it makes no difference.

 

This is but one of the many expressions of affection which characterize the spiritual letters of these friends.  The deep affection they have for each other is generously shared with all the women and men with whom they enter into a spiritual relationship.  There is no holding back, no careful distance, no concern about possible misinterpretations, no fear for too much too soon.  To the contrary, there is a constant encouragement to be open, direct and spontaneous.  Both Francis and Jane give and receive affection freely and share it generously with all who are part of their spiritual family.

 

In a time in which there is so much concern about the right professional distance within a helping relationship and in which there is so much preoccupation with transference and counter-transference, Jane de Chantal and Francis de Sales offer us a fresh perspective on a healing relationship.  They dare to take risks with each other and those they care for.  Mutuality is the word here.  It is the mutuality of the ministry of Jesus the Good Shepherd who says: “I know my own and my own know me” (Jn. 10:14).  A mutual openness, a mutual sharing, a mutual confession of needs, a mutual confession and forgiveness, a mutual knowing and being known – that is the source of a community where God’s strength is made manifest among weak people.  The Jesus-centred affectionate friendship between Francis de Sales and Jane de Chantal, generally shared with the many who came to them for spiritual comfort and consolation, is a great gift to our century.

 

I rejoice in the publication of these letters in the English language.  They encourage us to make Jesus the centre of all our relationships and then create the space for each other in which we can express our affection without fear in mutual vulnerability.  In our distrustful, fearful and fragmented world constantly exploding in violence and destruction, friendships such as lived out by Francis and Jane and expressed in these letters point the way to healing, reconciliation and new life.  How to develop and nurture such friendships?  This book suggests that writing letters may still be one of the most fruitful ways.

 

Giving less hours to the dark violent forces of contemporary entertainment and more to writing letters in the spirit of Jesus is a true discipline of friendship.  During the quite peaceful hours that we spend communicating God’s love to others in our letters, we build a new community and bring light into the world.  This is what Francis and Jane did in their time.  This is what we still can do in ours.  I have little doubt that the fruits will be plentiful.

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